Dave is new to the performance poetry scene and took the Bang Said The Gun award on his second ever gig. He used to be on the character and sketch act circuit and has had four sell-out shows back to back at the Edinburgh Festival, including at the Gilded Balloon and Assembly Rooms. He’s also gigged at Latitude Festival and been on BBC 2’s ‘Z For Fake’ and Channel 4 Comedy Lab. London born and bred, he gigs regularly on the spoken word circuit, and loves nothing more than reading Bukowski till he pukes.

"An extraordinarily strong and original voice...brave, clever, confident and articulate" - The Stage.

"Comically surreal" - Metro.

“Florez excels at physical comedy” – Scotsman.

“Pick Of The Fringe 2008 *****” – Fringe Review.

Papa Don't Preach

‘So, let me get this straight’, Isaac said

As his father wrenched him from his bed

‘Some geezer called God, some bloke that doesn’t even exist

Wants you to sacrifice your only son, right? That’s the gist’

There’s nothing I’ve missed, right?’

‘That’s basically it, yeah’, said Abraham, pulling on his son’s wrist

‘He’s God, he’s the boss, he’s El Supremo’

‘Yeah, I think I must’ve missed that memo,

Dad, I’m 37 years old. This better be a joke.

Think you’ve been out in the sun too long, you might have heatstroke

Look, why don’t you just sit down and have a toke

It’s good stuff, got it off this bloke…from Mesopotamia’.

‘Look here boy, I’ve just circumcised myself and smashed up my dad’s business, I’m hardly likely to join you in a smoke, anyway we haven’t got any rizlas’.

‘Whoah, go back two, you what yourself?’

‘Sure, but don’t worry, if you want I can do yours’

Said Abe matter-of-factly while he laid down more laws

But it got to a point where Isaac had to interject

On the grounds of respect, intellect and thoughts circumspect

‘Dad, your approaching 112, it’s time to move into that home

I think there are some things that even you have outgrown

Like starting new religions by yourself all alone

And reaping the fruits of the seeds you have sown

Dad, I hate to say this but you’ve finally flipped,

Slipped and tripped on situations you’ve barely gripped

I’m putting my foot down, this bud has been nipped

I will speak my mind and no more be tight-lipped

This horse has been whipped passed the post that is pipped

I mean no offence but your flies are unzipped

Which in light of the snip is ill-judged, Isaac quipped,

- but totally understandable, it needs to breathe.

Point is, I trust and obey you, perhaps now more than ever

And if your God is right, then my neck you must sever

For to die for you now would be my duty and pleasure, however

Your God isn’t my God, my God and my treasure

Lies in things I can hold and can see and can measure

Not in buildings of worship or gold or endeavour

But in people and kinship and on-this-earth-heaven

Dad, you were right all my life but this time you are wrong

In this vision of yours, I do not belong

You are old and you’re wise, I am young and headstrong, yes

But there are some things in life will remain forever undone, lest

The sins of the father shall be visited upon the son’.

Abraham shrugged and set about the altar.